Ice Cream Realizations

I did a little ice cream experiment today. The flavor of the day was peanut butter at Rob and Deb's. I had promised myself for several weeks that I could have it when the day arrived, but I wasn't wholeheartedly wanting it today.  I felt quite ambivalent and indecisive. I went and had it anyway - afraid that I would later resent not indulging.  I ate the whole flurry and I realized a few things:


Ice Cream Realizations
It doesn't taste as good to me as it used to. This particular ice cream isn't "worth it" anymore.


This is not who I am anymore ....someone who drives 15 minutes to Rob and Deb's solely to get ice cream and come back. It just isn't that important to me.


My body speaks to me in fleeting whispers. I have to listen oh so carefully to hear the whispers in time to act.


I need to reflect on fear. In this case I decided to get the ice cream because I was anticipating and fearing feeling deprived. Fear in the moment is one thing, but anticipating fear? How often do I make decisions like that?


I wasn't one in the moment with my body today. I was basing my decision on an unknown future.  No more fortune telling. I need to be hearing my body in the moment and have my "head in the game".

A big part of eating for me is texture. Today it was the way the ice cream got all "melty" and had the chewy little chunks of snickers. I think sometimes texture reels me in more than taste.


When I make my banana ice cream (just frozen banana, milk, and cinnamon) it doesn't cause me to "crash" afterwards.


Fudge Brownie a la Mode is still worth it for me, when I eat it in moderation.