Ice Cream Realizations

I did a little ice cream experiment today. The flavor of the day was peanut butter at Rob and Deb's. I had promised myself for several weeks that I could have it when the day arrived, but I wasn't wholeheartedly wanting it today.  I felt quite ambivalent and indecisive. I went and had it anyway - afraid that I would later resent not indulging.  I ate the whole flurry and I realized a few things:


Ice Cream Realizations
It doesn't taste as good to me as it used to. This particular ice cream isn't "worth it" anymore.


This is not who I am anymore ....someone who drives 15 minutes to Rob and Deb's solely to get ice cream and come back. It just isn't that important to me.


My body speaks to me in fleeting whispers. I have to listen oh so carefully to hear the whispers in time to act.


I need to reflect on fear. In this case I decided to get the ice cream because I was anticipating and fearing feeling deprived. Fear in the moment is one thing, but anticipating fear? How often do I make decisions like that?


I wasn't one in the moment with my body today. I was basing my decision on an unknown future.  No more fortune telling. I need to be hearing my body in the moment and have my "head in the game".

A big part of eating for me is texture. Today it was the way the ice cream got all "melty" and had the chewy little chunks of snickers. I think sometimes texture reels me in more than taste.


When I make my banana ice cream (just frozen banana, milk, and cinnamon) it doesn't cause me to "crash" afterwards.


Fudge Brownie a la Mode is still worth it for me, when I eat it in moderation.  

Committed to Losing Weight

Day 11 - No Bingeing


Number 2 on the list of Common Pitfalls to Change is "not making a serious commitment".  


I am definitely guilty of this one. I often do this halfhearted dieting thing. I have to remind myself that doing the on and off thing does not work.  Losing weight takes serious commitment. I can continue doing the halfhearted thing or I can get serious and take off the weight.


Serious commitment means I am ready to sometimes be uncomfortable with  my actions. I am ready to make sacrifices in the name of losing weight. For example, it takes more time to shop regularly and prepare my fruits and veggies. Planning ahead takes more time and effort. There will be times it feels pretty easy to eat well and there will be times it feels tough. Having a commitment to my goal means that I continue on my course, regardless of how I feel.


I do not have to be Wonder Woman. I just have to want it enough to make it happen.  


I managed to eat my absolute favorite ice cream (Stewart's Fudge Brownie a La Mode) last night without a binge. Yum.