The Way You Do One Thing

Day 4 - No Bingeing 


I feel good! ( cue music - ba na na na na na nuh)  Eating in moderation feels great, easy even, once I get in a groove.  I feel energetic, balanced, and happy. I have felt this way before.


Yet, something always trips me up and keeps me from making my changes permanent. I guess more specifically "I" trip myself up. I hope blogging and observing carefully will help me figure out what has derailed my progress in the past.


I have a hunch it may be my "perfectionistic tendencies". I took an on line class with Geneen Roth and she said "The way you do one thing is the way you do everything." I had never thought about or applied that statement to my eating. How do I eat? Mostly healthfully. Sometimes I binge (pint of Ben and Jerry's anyone?).  Over time, the implication behind Geneen's words became more clear to me.


I am the kind of person who believes it isn't worth doing if you don't do it well. I feel happiest when I can give something 100%.  


So for example, if I can keep my house super organized and clean I am happy and can relax. If I can only keep it somewhat clean, it bothers me. I feel irritated and unable to relax.


I work too much. (I am a teacher.) I love my job and it is part career / part passion. It is easy for me to get engaged in doing work and not stop to enjoy time with my family. I do work all the time - weeknight, weekends, summer! I do this because I never feel like "good is good enough". I have to make something ( a lesson, an activity, a project) perfect. 


I think I show the same tendencies with my food and exercise. I do it perfectly or I ditch the effort completely. Now I have been through multiple diets in my life (Weight Watchers, Diet Workshop, Diet Center, etc.) and I have heard many times that this type of thinking is not productive. However, I never realized how deeply ingrained it is in me and how many areas of my life it impacts. 


I am trying to learn that "perfection leaves little room for pleasure and joy" and that "sometimes good is good enough".